Those in the crossdressing community love to argue that crossdressing is a harmless hobby. Although other people in the culture find it weird, they just need more time to get used to it and see that it actually can be a fun hobby if not done to excess. Or they say that regular people are only turned off to it because they haven’t been exposed to it enough. Or they say that it is not a symptom of a confused identity but rather a healthy expression of true identity. Or they say that a man who crossdresses is actually a woman, and we should refer to him as a woman. His body doesn’t matter. Etc.
But if you find such statements convincing, let me ask you this question? What would you think about a person of white skin, who secretly made themselves up to look like a “black” or “brown” person (whatever color terms you want to use) secretly in the privacy of their home every possible chance they could get? And then you found out that they were compelled to do it. And imagine that they said it’s an expression of their true identity. Don’t you think this would be odd? Sure it might not be harming anyone, but don’t you think this person might need some psychiatric help? Don’t you think this might mean the person has a psychological problem that they need some counseling to address? Don’t you think this person is not accepting themselves for who they really are?
Let me take it further. Those of you who crossdress and actually go out in public, pretending to be women, and you argue again that it is harmless, and love it when people cannot notice you, well how would you feel about this white person trying to pretend (convincingly) that they are a black person? Or a black person being out in public trying to convince people they are white? I would for sure find this person to be odd, and maybe would even be turned off or offended. At the very least, I would again think that they need some kind of psychiatric help. Why can’t they be who God created them to be, instead of deceiving us? I would wonder if such a person feels shame about his skin color. I would counsel such a person to remember that regardless of cultural pressures and ideas, they are made in the image of God, they are valuable to God, and they do not need to be ashamed of their skin color.
Do you feel differently? Do you think the same way about people who would do that as you think about your crossdressing? Or do you think the two issues are completely different? If so, how? To me the issues are the same. In both cases there is a psychological problem. The person feeling a compulsion to change their skin color needs counseling, just as the person who feels a compulsion to change their sex needs counseling.
Let me take it further. What if you discovered your daughter in the bathroom at home vomiting up all of her food? Upon talking to her you find out that although she is skin and bones, she believes herself to be very fat and even obese? You then remember you haven’t seen her eating much in the past few months. Would you say, “my daughter, you are right, how you see yourself is how you really are. If you think you are fat, then I will accept that what you say about yourself is true.” No! You would never say that. You would take this daughter to see a counselor. Her life depends on it.
What if your teenage son was always hiding in the bathroom making himself appear as much like a frog, or falcon, or cat, or hyena, or fish as he could (take your pick of animal)? What if you found out and asked him why he did it, and he said in seriousness and tears that he was expressing his catness, and that if he didn’t express his catness he would get depressed and he didn’t want to suppress his catness? Would you tell him to embrace his catness and that it doesn’t matter if the world thinks he is odd, and he can dress up as a cat every day for the rest of his life if he really wants to? Or would you get him psychiatric help to help him realize and accept that he is a human, and not a cat? I hope for his sake, you would not indulge his delusion, but out of love, you would help him to see reality.
So why do some people think so differently about transgenderism? Is it simply because it is so easy to change our appearance these days through hormones, surgery, and makeup?
There is nothing wrong with being black or white. There is nothing wrong with being human. If people are ashamed to be black, or white, or human, then of course, we want to help them realize they do not need to be ashamed, and they can accept themselves as they are. Why do we treat sex differently? If someone is a man but feels like he needs to dress like a woman, or even feels like he “is” a woman, why don’t we again try to help him accept himself as he is instead of encouraging him to continue the masquerade? Being a man is good and being a woman is good. But we should be what we were born to be.
Some of you might want to retort that make-believe is harmless. Kids do it all the time. People who play RPG’s also role play. But there is a difference. If a kid has to stop pretending he is a fireman, or if you tell someone they have to do homework and so cannot play their favorite RPG for the rest of the year, they don’t go into a depression, they don’t feel like they are suppressing anything, and they don’t feel like you are messing with their identity.
All of these things I’ve mentioned, including transgenderism, are psychological issues. They need psychological treatment. Indulging in the false realities of these people is not a way to love them but to hate them. We need to help them value and treasure and be proud of who they really are, not encourage them to feel shame about themselves, not encourage them to try to be other people.